Wanna be a Rock Star!

Another day had passed. And tomorrow its working day again. All this will ends in 3 months plus time. Jobs interviewing cal keeps on coming in, but date of availability is the killer part which makes me lose opportunity. Whatever it is, i had choosen the path, thus i will not look back again. Let me uses this time to bulit up my own career before i ord. At least i will have a small start and get use to the pace so when i ord i will have greater achievements. I supposed. Have been drinking too much over last year, till my liver isnt functioning well. Finally found out the cuased of my hand shaking root. Prelims suspect by doctor isnt foolproof but everything still needs to wait for the 1st prelim test is done so to have a clear picture of it. But still, it just an advise, i cant possible gave up on drinking. maybe drink lesser might helps? I suppose. How many 10 yrs does a person have. How many 10 yrs can a person really lived up to. But whats important is, fight for ur own future with ur own hands and build up the empire that u wanted for. Fighting for something u love, the process of doing it is not easy. But does it means that u need to gave up totally when u sees no hope in it? Isnt it supposed to be the way that u go all the way out and fight till the end until the last breathe of ur life? Isnt it supposed to be the fighting spirits that one should have? Sometimes thinking to myself, am i really wrong? Am i really overly aggressive towards this r/s? What is it that i really cant let go.? The only thing i know is when i let it go, this would be the greatest regret i had. So what should i do. Enlighten me pls. Show me the path pls.